Thursday, March 29, 2012

Coronation Street staircase accidents reach alarming proportions

please note: this post makes reference to the March 28 episode on CBC

CORONATION STREET STAIRCASE ACCIDENTS: 
A WEATHERFIELD GAZETTE INVESTIGATIVE REPORT
by Corrie Heart, Weatherfield Gazette Investigative Reporter & Food Critic

An investigation by the Weatherfield Gazette has revealed an alarming upswing in the number of staircase-related accidents which have occurred on Coronation Street.

The most recent incident involved a woman who claims she was pushed down the stairs of an apartment above a local taxi firm. The woman, who was later identified as Tracy Barlow of Coronation Street, claimed that a "manky skank who's always trying it on with Steve" shoved her down a flight of stairs. Ms. Barlow was later taken to hospital.

The incident followed a similar occurrence involving another local woman, Leanne Battersby, who tumbled down the stairs of her flat above a Bookies.  No charges were laid and police investigators found no evidence of wrongdoing.

Historical records show a third staircase incident occurred on the same street, this time involving Gail Platt who claimed, at the time, that she slipped on the stairs of her home. The cause of the accident was later attributed to her demon spawn, David Platt, although police have so far not linked the young psycho hairdresser to any other staircase incidents.

***
Official Coronation Street Catfight Countdown Clock™
NUMBER OF ELAPSED DAYS WITHOUT A KNOCK DOWN, DRAG OUT FIGHT BETWEEN CARLA & LEANNE:
2

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